Denim a No-No.

May 16, 2008 at 12:08 PM
12 comments

To the men of the San Francisco Bay Area, and other places where it's unseasonably warm right now:

Even if your HR department relinquishes the office dress code in an effort to appease employees dying of heat and allows the wearing of shorts, please do not take this is not an invitation to wear denim shorts. Under no circumstances should you even own such garments. They do not communicate professionalism, nor do they communicate a sense of style.

Denim shorts: fashion faux-pas.

Jean shorts: don't even think about it.

Their significant lack of both should promptly encourage you to purchase and wear a better alternative: chino shorts.

Chino Shorts: much better.

Available in a variety of colors from just about any apparel retailer, chino shorts are not only more attractive, but in hot weather are much more comfortable. They are lighter weight, fabricated in more technically advanced materials, tend to fit properly (unlike most denim shorts which are usually either too large & baggy or too tight & short), and communicate class.

Please make note of this for future outfit decisions. Thank you.

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But why can't they wear denim shorts out and about? No one should wear denim shorts to work - ever - but out in public? Sure!

Jean shorts anywhere, in my opinion, are complete ick-factor. It's just a thing. I have never seen a guy wear jean shorts and afterward think to myself that they look good. Perhaps it's that when a man usually decides to wear jean shorts, the rest of his ensemble matches in the ew-factor, in the I-can't-dress-myself sense. Overall, very few men, I think, can pull-off jean shorts. Canvas ones will always look better. Especially at work.

Mean!! They don't look that bad.

My dad wears them with Jimmy Buffet-esque shirts.

Okay. Dads are definitely the exception. They're our dads. Jean shorts will not deter my love! haha. Men in that generation wearing denim shorts, I can deal.

But on dudes in our generation...ew.

But but! Sometimes they are lost and confused and do not understand the ways of fashion as well as the master (you).

Hee hee. Moi? Un master de fashion. Oui oui!

I try to share my wisdom where I can. Hence, the post. Some men just don't know any better... poor men. :)

Poor sad little men.

You are my fashion guru until you decide leggings are FAB. Then... you cease to exist in my world.

I promise you. Leggings will never EVER be fab. I refuse to give in to that trend. I've resisted for two years now!! Yay. You and I might be the last two standing without leggings, but stand together we shall.

*resists resists resists*

Tights, however, are okay by me, so long as they don't do that uncomfortable gap-osis in the crotch.

I actually have a pair of leggings, but they're gym leggings, not fashion leggings.

JUST WANTED TO POINT IT OUT NOW SO OUR FRIENDSHIP WASN'T RUINED LATER BY MY AWFUL DARK SECRET.

As long as we're admitting things... I have one pair for the gym, too. BUT...and don't hate me forever...mine are adidas stirrup leggings. The WORST FAUX-PAS OF ALL.

But to my own defense, they're great for their intended purpose, because if they didn't have the part that went around my foot, they'd probably be too short for my insanely-long-and-hard-to-shop-for limbs.

I also promise never to let leggings stand in between our friendship. Unless, of course, you go behind my back and wear CROPPED leggings underneath a denim mini skirt. Then, I will no longer associate myself with you. And insist on walking 5 feet ahead of you, or behind you, at all times.

Love, love. :)